Not So Easy This Time

Steve is leaving very early tomorrow morning.

It feels harder than ever to let Steve go. It's been a bit of an emotional day for me. I don't feel ready for this right now, yet, there is nothing that can be done about it. I've been trying to hold in the tears most of the day, but this evening I finally let them go. Steve went upstairs to record himself reading a relaxtion script and a book I bought for the baby, so I stayed downstairs and began to write in my journal for the evening. And there they were, those darn tears I've been holding back. I don't usually cry so much when he goes. Of course I cry a little the night before, and then a little more after I drop him off at the airport... but this time I can't help but sob and sob. Darn pregnancy hormones! But, really, its more than that. I'm going to miss him terribly. This time home (and most times) was such a sweet experience. Of all the things in my life (the gospel goes without saying and so does this I reckon), our marriage is the greatest blessing I could ever have. I'm so grateful to have such an amazing marriage to an amazing man.

Steve, I love you! I wish you didn't have to go... I know you wish the same. Here's to just 3 more months.